:: bonding . 友谊的考验 ::

今天和几位同学朋友外出
由于今天没上课，
约了一同去唱k。
全场下来
突然觉得莫名的孤独
那孤僻，antisocial 的feeling又回来了。
我真的不习惯如此emo的我。
因为那样真的很难受。
或许是因为我早前身体不适，
头有那么一点痛的关系。
但似乎，旁人也没查到什么不对经。
又或许他们还年轻，
无法了解他人。
朋友朋友。到底如何才是朋友？
我似乎已经忘了。
要到已经分开后才珍惜那段友谊吗？

i can't feel our friendship going anywhere further
is it just me or is it true?
我和中学朋友以及当兵队友那种bonding到了那里呢？
or am i just in the wrong clique?
真的希望不是。

i choose to think i am just too stressed
that i'm thinking too wildly.
its tough to blend in
really
not an age matter
just a personal thing.
当时看到的closeness好像lost了。
我的best friend 真的在这当中吗?
我还在等待。

thats the problem with big groups
you will naturally form small fractions
and when there are extraordinary relationships
things change
and as the quiet, queer, oft emo boy i have always been
i easily feel neglected.

how to make me feel loved? i do not know.
i just wait.. for the correct feeling to come.